My personal epilogue for the “cotton ceiling”…

I know the conference is passed and the issue is over for the moment, but I just want to issue a parting “fuck you” to all the people who have treated me like shit (hello, entire Left-Libertarian Forum! go fuck yourselves, bigots!) and have portrayed me as a a bigot (projecting much, misogynist assholes?) for daring to speak against sexual coercion. I hate you and everything you stand for. It’s true that I hate pretty much everyone, but I thought it bore repeating.

But most importantly, I wanted to post this video that ibleedpurple posted on the comments to that entry.

Actually, women not wanting to fuck you is not a social justice issue. Actually, entitlement to female bodies IS. Treating females like public personal property IS. Disrespecting lesbians IS.

You got that, assholes? How many times do women have to tell you this before you get it? You sure as hell don’t listen when I say it, but at least listen to the women who are victimized by this shit.

Now I am totally done with this bullshit… unless the “cotton ceiling” rationalization becomes a runaway hit, which doesn’t seem too likely. I do look forward to the next ceilings they make up next, though… maybe we’ll see a “celluloid ceiling” next (because women who don’t do porn are depriving us of their bodies, you see). That would make about as much sense.

22 thoughts on “My personal epilogue for the “cotton ceiling”…

  1. Birthday Pony April 4, 2012 at 21:33

    For anyone that wants to see the supposedly misogynistic thread Francois is talking about…

    • Francois Tremblay April 4, 2012 at 21:34

      Well, I wasn’t going to link to the forum out of the remaining smidgen of respect I had for you people, but hey, if you’re gonna do it… now everyone can see the rock stupidity I’m cursing against.

      PS fuck you, BP

  2. bugbrennan April 5, 2012 at 02:13

    Thank you for standing up for Females.

  3. bugbrennan April 5, 2012 at 02:14

    Reblogged this on You think I just don't understand, but I don't believe you. and commented:
    Thank you for standing up for Females.

  4. Bluemorpho April 5, 2012 at 20:20

    “We can infer from that what kind of boundaries this person has: none.”

    Shut. The. Fuck. Up. You don’t know shit about a person’s boundaries because they’re a sex worker. That’s a slut-shaming, dehumanizing, and dangerous perception to put on people who do sex work. They have to know more about their boundaries and fight harder for their safety than anyone.

    “Packing dick.”

    Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Somebody’s junk doesn’t define their sex. Dick is not a weapon you pack like a gun. And having a dick–whether that’s how you language it or not–doesn’t make you a threat to lesbians. Just maybe not every lesbian’s cup of tea. And not everyone has access to the hormonal and surgical procedures that would make their physical bodies more legible to outsiders as female, even if a full physical transition were desirable.

    How is anybody treating lesbians as sexual property because trans women want to sleep with them?

    Many trans women are attracted to each other as trans women. Some are attracted to trans men. Some to cis men. Some to cis women. Some to genderqueer/genderfluid people. KIND OF DEPENDS ON THE PERSON. So it’s not a valid argument to infer that trans women aren’t sleeping with each other because many of them also want to sleep with cis lesbians.

    You’ve confused the issue of trans women struggling with being excluded from the lesbian dating pool–which is both a real struggle with painful, misgendering connotations and also not anything anybody is claiming as a right, merely as an aspiration–with trans women demanding lesbians meet their sexual demands.

    I can’t even figure out how you inserted yourself into this conversation at all. This is Not About You. If you don’t want to date a trans woman, DON’T. Trans women wanting to get laid is sooooo not your business.

    A Cis Queer Femme

    • Francois Tremblay April 5, 2012 at 21:44

      Who are you addressing? I’m pretty sure I’ve never said either of these things, because this is not the way I write.

    • LJ April 11, 2012 at 14:47

      “A Cis Queer Femme”, your post is seriously angry and it’s very telling that you identify as “queer”. You are obviously not a lesbian. I am just honestly quite bemused as to how to react to the idea that dick may or may not be a lesbian’s “cup of tea.” All I can say is that lesbians don’t like dick and it really baffles and depresses me that that is a controversial statement in 2012. I am well aware that some women identify as lesbian even though they DO like dick but frankly you can push a word to its limit and it simply becomes meaningless; devaluing a word doesn’t mean you own it and the vast majority of lesbian women do not call themselves “queer”, do not see sexuality on a spectrum, do not sit around thinking which groups they need to include in or out of their sexual choices, do not think “am I attracted to women with a dick, hmm…” – it’s all beyond so many of us. We are simply women going about the business of loving women.

      The fact is that some women do not always fall for the “person” but have a general overriding sexuality (in fact, I’d say most people were in this category, thousands of internet posts from the minority with broader tastes notwithstanding). Rejecting dick might be hard to fathom but some women don’t actually like it, don’t want to bend their minds around liking it, and don’t need to apologise for that. If you are someone who is not actually a lesbian and so does not reject dick out of hand (as it were…) then you might not think lesbians are being very fair but then I’d say you haven’t even attempted to appreciate that for some women their feelings are so strong that yep, a dick would be a dealbreaker. I have absolutely no idea why the small number of women with that preference for no dick should be a problem for anyone. Just leave us to it.

  5. […] The recent rants against trans-women made me raise an eyebrow about the sheer level irrationality displayed here, but then I folloeda link to a discussion and found out this quote I don’t want your fucking sympathy, trans-lover. […]

  6. indiyesreally April 8, 2012 at 16:18

    the only thing u have right is everyone hates you.

    • Francois Tremblay April 8, 2012 at 16:21

      No you moron… *I* hate *everyone*, not the reverse. Your reading comprehension is low.

  7. Lesley (@Lesley213Lesley) April 20, 2012 at 09:18

    Totally agree Francois Tremblay.

    Cotton ceiling is an offensive misogynistic term that brings to mind the image of Transexual men literally breaking down the barriers of women’s pants to get into their vaginas. The fact that this term is thought acceptable, betrays the misogony at the root of much Transexual “theory”.

    But transexuals also have a point. Many lesbians do say they accept Transexuals as women and lesbians and welcome them into women only space. But they would never consider actually sleeping with someone who is Transexual.

    The theory of cotton ceiling sees this as evidence of Transphobia. I think it is actually evidence that most lesbians actually at a deep level do not accept Transexual MtoT as women. They recognise, whatever they might actually say, that MtoT are really men. And lesbians do not generally sleep with men.

    I know you will call me Transphobic. But if it is Transphobic to believe that MtoT will always be men, then yes I am transphobic. So?

    • catezewo April 24, 2012 at 00:59

      Is anyone really transphobic though? You can’t really take on the role of a fear; you simply feel and express it. Anyway… If what you (and many like you) have mentioned is true then, I’d completely agree with you. If transmen (which you reference to) were actually just women pretending to be men I’d be concerned too. There are people all throughout society who are pretending to be what they are not; however, I know first-hand that transsexualism is real. I’m not even going to attempt to change your mind. Everyone is free to believe whatever they choose to; and if I knew you in person, I’d be disappointed if you took my word for it without researching transsexualism or getting to know me. I’m just saying, it exists in reality, despite what you or others believe. The stupidity of suggesting it’s real to someone who maintains it isn’t, isn’t lost on me, lol.

      I’m going to take your bait… I’m fairly sure a transman would understand who lesbians are (generally) attracted to and know that they would no longer be interested in a relationship regardless of their genitals. I know a transwoman who had a gay boyfriend before she started transitioning and it didn’t take too long for them to drift apart for obvious reasons. It’s a really complicated subject if you attempt to be intelligent about the discussion. A gay man isn’t usually attracted to a transwoman, and (assuming they aren’t into particular fetishes) a lesbian and a heterosexual man have considerable difficulty with a transwoman before GRS when a relationship gets to the bedroom. This is the reality. The cotton ceiling isn’t about forced sexual relationships, or “rape” as some pathetic RadFems suggest. It’s about not categorising someone based on their genitals. Sure if you don’t like penises or vaginas… you don’t… it’s that simple. No one should make you feel bad about what you need in the bedroom, but you should definitely not make someone feel bad about not having what you need. If a transwoman and a lesbian make it as far as the bedroom then it comes down to the reality that some lesbians both accept and reject penises (real/fake), and some lesbians both accept and reject the transsexual condition. Whichever combination it leads to, the cotton ceiling exists. It’s just about our personal connotations with particular genitalia; and it attempts to address transsexual recognition.

    • Francois Tremblay May 2, 2012 at 13:39

      Thank you for reposting again! I’ve had a very good response from radfems, even though my opponents have even accused me of being against feminism and against women (??). I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that bigots have weird thought patterns.

      • bugbrennan May 2, 2012 at 16:26

        Yes. I have recently realized that there is a huge problem with people conflating sex and gender. If you tumblr, join us! We need you!

        • Francois Tremblay May 3, 2012 at 00:15

          I don’t really get the whole tumblr thing. Isn’t it like a blog but without comments threads? What’s the point?

          • bugbrennan May 3, 2012 at 04:06

            Yes, it’s a blog, but the reblogging feature replaces comments. It is apparently where the action is. On a related note, I will never let my kids on the Internet.

  8. Bedelia Bloodyknuckle May 2, 2012 at 15:33

    I seriously wish these trans people would stop slapping the label anarchist on themselves…….it’s annoying!

    • Francois Tremblay May 3, 2012 at 00:16

      Do they? I’ve only known one. And she was majorly pissed at me with the whole cotton ceiling thing. Even though people (almost all men) keep calling me a bigot, I have nothing against trans people.

      • Bedelia Bloodyknuckle May 3, 2012 at 20:32

        I have seen plenty of transpeople appropriate the label of anarchist. There is one transwoman on Tumblr that calls himself transfeminist but rejects the label feminist…..

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