I used to have a bunch of camgirl mutuals (on an account I no longer use) and what I learned from them about the realities of being a camgirl couldn’t be farther from the glamorized image of the fun/happy camgirl who makes a living (or at least a hefty amount of spending money) by just showing off her body.
“Body positivity” that encourages women to take nude pictures and post sexual content online as proof of “feeling good” about their bodies has led to many young girls thinking being a camgirl would be fun. I’m thinking specifically of several 16-17 year old girls I’ve seen post about how they can’t wait to turn 18 so they can be a camgirl. Or women around 18-20 who post about wanting to start camming soon. It’s not the glamorous life you’ve been told it is.
Most of the camgirls I followed struggled with bills. Being a full-time camgirl was not enough. They were either in debt, or being supported by someone else. These were women of all different shapes and sizes; including thin white women with sharp noses (who would be considered the epitome of beauty by western beauty standards). So no, it’s not that these women weren’t “hot” enough.
The money was not fast nor easy. The ones who were remotely successful had to purchase professional lighting. They had either a separate room in their homes set up and decorated for camming, or they’d make their bed their studio. They had to buy lots of lingerie and sexy costumes. Guys aren’t interested in seeing the same nude woman (or woman in the same 2 sets of lingerie she owns) over and over. They want to know that you’re spending money and effort to please them. Camgirls would have to regularly post on multiple social media accounts (most had at least 3, including Tumblr and Twitter). They’d post their cam schedules for the week/month. They’d make several posts in the hours leading up to their cam show, advertising that they’re about to go live, complete with teaser pics. This was all in the hopes that men would see the posts and be enticed enough to pay to see their show, or order videos. The men were lazy and entitled. They wouldn’t do research to find the *perfect* woman they wanted to see, they’d order women up like delivery. You’ve gotta keep making posts, every hour on the hour, if you want men to see you and notice you. It also requires being on-call, constantly. They don’t care what you’re doing or where you are, you’d better be ready to immediately engage in cyber sex or respond with glee to their sexual harassment. Many men would demand women send them pics immediately as well (whether or not these guys would pay for that is another story). That was the point; they wanted these women to be their virtual sex dolls, women they could control from miles away, for free or dirt cheap. Oh, you’re out shopping/at work/at a friend’s house? They’d tell you they don’t give a fuck, you better send them a picture of you pouting while spreading your labia like the insatiable slut you are, right now, or they’re never buying any content from you ever again. Many camgirls would try to do it quickly (while noone’s looking or noone’s in the room), or sneak off to the bathroom to do it so they could appease these guys, and hope they buy from them in the future. Many would say that’s not good enough, they don’t want an exposed picture from the safety of a bathroom. They want you to spread your legs or expose a breast where you might get caught. They wanted these women to be in danger of being caught exposing themselves, and they wanted the fantasy of the insatiable slut who was so money hungry and wanted dick that she didn’t care, and would do anything to please him. (That was another thing, camgirls were regularly posited as money grubbing gold diggers for asking for anything for their content. The men expected it for free.)
This gets to the hosting sites. Even if you had enough money for your own site, who’s gonna find it? Who’s gonna know about it? It’s better to use a well known site that men go to for camgirls. Most cam girls would use cam girl hosting sites which would act as pimps. The one that gave women the highest percentage of revenue I could find at the time was one that kept 60% of the profits from every sale. These sites were always designed for the benefit of the men, not the camgirls. It would be “against the rules” to show full nudity in preview panels (you have to pay to go into a camgirl’s “room”) but the sites would do nothing about camgirls who did show full nudity for free. Why is a guy gonna pay to get into your room, when another girl is doing it for free? That’s another thing. Samples. It was a constant struggle, with camgirls trying to convince men to pay for their services, and men trying to convince camgirls to do it for free. They’d harass women for “samples” (i.e. free shows/videos/photo sets) before paying. Many men would pose as promoters or pretend to have camsites of their own, and demand you send them free content for “exposure”. Some men would promise to pay for services after receiving them, under the guise of not wanting to be ripped off…and then never pay. A camgirl had done a custom show for a John through a camsite, and he complained to the camsite that he never received the show (despite it happening live on their servers). The camgirl was required to give him a full refund, or be permanently banned from the camsite. It was also “against the rules” for Johns to record cam shows, but they did it all the time. They’d record the shows, upload them to their own sites, and profit off of these women without giving them a penny. There was no recourse. Being exploited and having videos and pictures of your nude body in sex acts resold was just “part of the job”.
Men would dissect every part of you. They’d talk about how parts were too big, too small, not the perfect color, not wet enough, not narrow enough, not wide enough, etc. and camgirls would be told by others to “not take it personally”. How are you not supposed to take it personally when it’s every crevice of your body being scrutinized? As though you are somehow detached from your body?
Camgirls would speak glowingly of men who bought them “gifts” (although these gifts weren’t usually free, they’d be in lieu of payment for a custom video or camshow). The men who did seem to buy camgirls “gifts” would be regular customers. So after paying $5 a pop for 10 videos that involved penetration in every orifice, giving you a couple bucks in your camshow room while you moaned about how much you wanted his dick, and sending you sexually harassing emails for months (that you’re obligated to be nice about if you want to keep him as a customer), he decided to be generous and buy you a $20 Lush item from your Amazon wishlist. Big whoop. And yes, camgirls would be forced to sell their vids/pics/shows for dirt cheap. Men were consuming them like products, and as products, they wanted the most value for the least amount of money. Again, why would he pay you $50 when there are hundreds of other camgirls he can buy content from for $5? Camgirls would often offer “rewards” for gifts (like a custom vid/pic set), and men would come out of the woodwork to double dip. Declaring that they’d treated the woman and “gifted” her money already – the money they spent buying content previously. After paying $5 for that full-length video, he’s now demanding free custom content as a reward…for “treating” you with that $5. Those guys didn’t see it as paying for a service. They felt entitled to these women’s bodies for free, and viewed any money they paid as overly generous donations that they should be further rewarded for.
Men didn’t want to see lots of different dynamic women in sexual situations. What they wanted was a fantasy. Regardless of how a camgirl started out, most would eventually gravitate toward the fantasy persona that sells – the happy insatiable woman who craved dick constantly, from any and every man. That’s what got them more views and responses on social media, because that’s what men wanted to see. Another “part of the job” was regular sexual harassment from men and dick pics. Whenever a camgirl would complain, she’d be told that it was “part of the job” and if she didn’t like it, she didn’t belong in the industry. Being a camgirl meant being a ragdoll for men to use and abuse, even though they couldn’t touch you. You weren’t a person. If you wanted them to throw some money your way, you had to dehumanize yourself into a dick crazed nymphomaniac who enjoyed rape threats.
Mild sex or normal masturbation didn’t get much attention. You had to be creative. Do weird and degrading things. Men seemed to like when camgirls would do a “show” together, especially if they looked incredibly uncomfortable. I remember one camgirl in particular getting lots of attention from men after she had injured her vagina during a show. They loved it. They loved that she had internally hurt herself for the pleasure of the men watching.
Men wanted to consume these women. All of them. Their entire lives. While the Johns would be communicating from anonymous accounts (or accounts with male profile pictures that were most likely not them), the camgirl was completely exposed (no pun intended). They’d demand to know more information, and camgirls would go to extreme lengths to try to keep the rest of their lives private (where they live, their friends, who they’re in a relationship with, etc). They were all trying to toe the dangerous line of men who were infatuated enough with their sexuality to give them money, but not infatuated enough to stalk them. Many had stalkers, endured violent threats, and men would threaten to send video and pictures of their shows to friends and family. They got off to “exposing” these women as “filthy sluts”, knowing that she would be the only one facing scrutiny, not him.
A camgirl got a bunch of backlash from Johns and unfollows once she made a post about having sex…that wasn’t on camera. They hated that she had sex for her own pleasure, off camera. They wanted the entirety of her sexuality to be a performance. For them. She said she couldn’t wait to save enough money so that she could delete all her profiles and her camgirl persona would no longer exist.